Supporting Our Kids When They Hate Math

This year we have had a tough time with math. My daughter dislikes it so much that at the mention of math, a grimace appears on her face and a stone tower erupts from the floor barricading her from any possible mathematical threat. Of course, there is no actual tower – no, the stone tower appears just by the look on her face and the stiffness of her countenance. Have you all seen such a look? When that stone tower appeared this year, I felt defeated and most of the time, we hadn't even begun the lesson for the day! I'm sure my daughter felt the same way.

So what's a mom to do? We can't give our children permission never to do a math lesson again, right?

If we were a perfect family, I could have pulled out a giant box of math manipulatives and games and my daughter would have gleefully exclaimed her appreciation and glad participation. A few days of this would reset any bad attitudes and refresh us for new learning, right? Sounds like a great blog post! The truth is, however, we are not a perfect family and I wasn't sure that games were going to get us over this rough spot.

So, I did what most moms would do.

I prayed for wisdom.

I required participation and looked for the reason behind her math angst.

I adjusted the amount of problems that she needed to do – eliminating those that were mastered.

We spent time reviewing a foundational area that was not mastered and was causing frustration.

I re-evaluated our curriculum and researched alternatives with different review styles.

I did not let my daughter give up, but neither did I allow her think she had no choices or options.

I encouraged her to trust God, to be obedient, and to learn His grace in her difficulty.

More than anything, I made sure my daughter knew that I was there to help and support her. There are certain things that must be done. Math is one of them. Yet, I didn't want this to be a power struggle. I needed to reach her heart, so I worked hard to let grace reign in my words and actions.

Our math struggles have not ended, but the stone tower has not erupted out of the floor as often. I think my daughter just needed to know that what she thinks and feels matters to me, that she is not alone and without help. That's what we all need, right?

“Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Behold, all who are incensed against you shall be put to shame and confounded; those who strive against you shall be as nothing and shall perish. You shall seek those who contend with you, but you shall not find them; those who war against you shall be as nothing at all. For I, the Lord your God, hold your right hand; it is I who say to you, “Fear not, I am the one who helps you.” ~Isaiah 41:10-13

 

So grateful,