War of Words - Chapter 10 - A Redemptive Perspective

Perspective is where God has been working the most in my life. The way we see people and circumstances colors our behavior and communication.

Before I knew Jesus, my perspective was all about me - I saw all things from the perspective of how it affected me:

I want.... I need...  You must.... You have to....

When I turned to Jesus, He began to work on me in terms of thinking about the perspective of others:

How do my words and actions affect the people in my life?  How am I influencing others for good or for bad?

During this stage of my walk with Christ, he also showed me that I trusted man more than I trusted God.  I would turn to man for counsel, before I sought the Lord.  I became crushed by the opinions of others, instead of being confident in Christ.  Instead of being hungry for Jesus, I was hungry for approval.  Fear kept me from speaking and living redemptively.

But God is faithful.  He didn't leave me there.  He continued to refine me by heating up my circumstances and skimming off the dross that surfaced.

In the last many years, the Holy Spirit has been infusing my heart with His perspective, and this chapter of War of Words has played a part in that.

"I realized that how I handle situations--what I say--is very important.  Either I am taking control and handling things in the way that seems best to me, or I am responding in a way that makes me part of what God wants to do through the circumstance." ~Frank and Ellen, page 160, War of Words

Adopting the Lord’s redemptive perspective is the most loving action we can perform in our relationship with others. When we ask the Lord what He wants to accomplish in our circumstances with others, we are loving Him with our obedience, and we are loving the people He has placed in our lives by communicating His way. It’s a win – win situation!

"We must never think of ourselves as objects of His covenantal  love without also thinking of ourselves as a conduit of that love to others." ~War of Words

In other words, God is committed to loving us, so we should be committed to loving others - His way.

It is important to note that we also recognize that we are joining the Lord in His work.  We are not supposed to do the work for Him.  Contrary, to many Christian authors, we are not God's helpers.  God does not need our help.  There is a big difference between God desiring our obedience, and God needing our help.  We serve a powerful and almighty God.  We must not forget that.  He does not need us.  He wants us.  Ponder that.  Let His love empower you to obey.

We are not here to be self-righteous, judgmental or haughty.

"Rather, God is saying that when He chooses to expose another's sin to us, we are to respond with self-sacrificing, redemptive love.  We go to our neighbor and honestly and clearly confront him with his sin -- not so that he would submit to our judgments, but so that he would submit to God's and seek His mercy and grace.  We want God, His will, and His mercy to loom large in the conversation--not us."

Lastly, I loved the encouragement that the Great Commission is a lifestyle.  As an introvert, this was comforting.  I have never felt called to participate in door to door evangelism. Yet, I have felt the pressure of man to perform in this way.  I have struggled with guilt and condemnation, but I realize that this is lie from the enemy fabricated to discourage and discredit those of us who are more introverted.  It's okay for someone else to canvas neighborhoods.  I need to do the job that the Lord calls me to do, and not worry about the rest.   God has led me to share Jesus with others in my day to day life, so that is what I will continue to do.

So, how about you?  Where do you struggle in communicating redemptively?  Has fear caused you to trim the truth, avoid issues, or excuse someone's sin rather than confront him?

Still need the book?  You can get it here: War of Words: Getting to the Heart of Your Communication Struggles (Resources for Changing Lives)

For more information on living redemptively, I recommend: Instruments in the Redeemer's Hands: People in Need of Change Helping People in Need of Change (Resources for Changing Lives)

Grateful for grace,

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